Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Simplicity

First of all, my brother (actually his wife Haley) did a great tribute of my dad's funeral on her blog. Please check it out here (click). There are pics of the viewing before the services, the program, and other insights. My Aunt Arlene (my dad's sister) has written down some memories on her blog, along with pictures, that I enjoyed reading and seeing too. Some of the pictures, I hadn't seen before. As McKay said, "I know which one grandpa is because of his plaid shirt," says it all. You can read her blog here (click). I decided to write about my thoughts and memories. I had several pictures I wanted to share so this will be a two day post. Today's being of the funeral and tomorrow's being of the kids.

My dad is a very simple man. He doesn't like things to be complicated and he hated to be late. I think he would have been very pleased with his funeral. My parents paid and picked out their funeral arrangements a little over seven years ago. It's really great planning if you think about it. Less stress at a stressful moment. Although when seven years go by things change. My mom had to pick out a new casket and a new panel inside the casket. Her choices were perfect.Jacob and the kids arrived (via airplane) on Tuesday. They thought it was so neat to fly over the Grand Canyon. Katanya greeted me with an "I'll love you no matter what, mom!" I had missed those guys. Jacob took the kids out after I left on Saturday to find new dresses for the girls and to get Cruz his first suit. I tease him for his "retail therapy" but he did a great job and actually found the dresses on clearance making them very affordable (so good he bought them two each.) I guess boy's suits never really go on sale.Spending my dad's last night in the hospital with him is one I will never regret. As I have run the last couple days, it has sorted out my thinking. It made me think, "Why is it that the hardest things we go through, are things we would never take back?" I'm grateful I got time to bond closer to my family the past week.I know my dad loved my mom. I know they had differences as we all do but there is such a strong bond. She had to see some really hard moments and make difficult choices but she did them out of love and respect for my dad. She was with him til the end of this life and will be with him forever.
The flowers were gorgeous! Jacob made the comment that this was the best arrangement he had ever seen. I totally agree!His display was sincere and had little reminders of him. Jacob made him over 35+ lugs for Christmas one year that said "Smith Farms." My dad would pick grapes every year and use / sell them. His chainsaw was there too. When I was little he would often go on trips to the Uintah's and bring back wood for winter and to sell. There is still a stack out behind the barn and he hadn't been in over 20 years. His hat was there too. As I mentioned in other posts, he always had hats. When I left on Saturday to fly out, Kirsten had put hers on that Grandpa had given her.Jacob's work went above and beyond. Not only did they give him extra time off for bereavement but they sent a beautiful bouquet of flowers for the funeral. (Maybe a degree does pay off.)Kent and his wife came down from Idaho. My kids got so excited when they heard they were coming. We rented his dad's house when we had first moved up there and he was also in our ward. Kent was a great neighbor and will always be a family friend. Anytime my dad came up to Idaho, he would say, "We have to visit Kent." My dad helped pruned his trees one time too. Kent said the opening prayer for my dad's service giving it just the "little bit of Idaho" that it needed.I saw a lot of family and friends that I hadn't seen in a long time. I heard quite often, "You were this big the last time I saw you!" with their hand at their waste. I tried to personalize with everybody so I could remember who came through. I remembered a lot and then on the rest, most of the time, I just needed a name and I remembered. It was also neat just to see some of my friends (and family members) come through to support me. I can't name them all but thanks! McKay is with her grandma and aunt, Merilyn and Jamie. -Jamie, McKay is catching up to you ;)I was afraid of how my dad would look in the casket. I remember seeing my grandpa when I was younger and thinking that it was nothing like the grandpa I knew. I don't know if it's because that was the case or if it's just because of my age. I think my dad looked as close to himself that he could. I got to know my brother and his family more while I was there. I am so glad I got to hang out with Haley throughout the week and be around her kids. My brother is definitely a lot like my dad in many ways.Monday evening, Mike called me and asked me to go for a ride with him. He just needed an out. We went and got a smoothie (which I later had several from Juice Press throughout the week) and then we headed out to the mall. He wanted to find a tie that was blue (grandpa's favorite color) and that reminded him of one of my dad's shirts. We found one at the mall so I picked up some extras so Jacob and Kevin (DeAnn's husband) could have one too. We also got the three grandson's a tie that coordinated with theirs. The Pallbearers were his son (Mike), his two sons-in-law (Jacob and Kevin), his brother (Brent), and two close friends. Duane (close friend) was the last speaker at his funeral and he spoke about simplicity. My dad was a simple man. He enjoyed growing a simple tomato. He enjoyed a simple sandwich. He enjoyed the simple things in life as should we.
I got Mikey's permission before I posted this picture. I LOVE the emotion in it. It reminds me of so many things but yet it is so simple. I see love, joy, sadness, but yet faith. Faith that he is happy and that we will all see him again.
My dad worked for the Lindon city as the supervisor over Parks and the Cemetery before he retired. He often joked around that they buried people in a tube either head first or feet first. His sister once believed him. It's a little ironic that that is where his body will rest. As I said earlier, my mom had to pick a new casket. The pine reminded me of my parent's house and all the wood that he used when he did the walls and the ceilings. It was the perfect choice.
And the last picture for the simple reminder.
Families are Forever!

3 comments:

Sarah Lamoreaux said...

Beautiful!

grannybabs said...

I'm glad you were able to have all these special experiences to treasure!!

Jacob said...

Amy I don't think that you realize that Jamie is stooping down so that she does not tower over McKay and Merylin.